Friday, April 11, 2008

Just Call Me The African Queen


I've run out of options here. Every spring I work in the garden. Every spring I get stung around the face by something that just swells me up and itches like crazy and takes forever to go away. For the past few years I've called the doctor and he's prescribed cortizone, and after a few days the swelling goes down and I'm ready for the next round. Last year it happened 3 times before the middle of June. The first time we had to cancel going to Chris's because my eyes were swollen shut. The second time was when we were having house guests, so they just had to put up with me looking the way I did. Each time, I got the cortizone and was better after 3 or 4 days. The second time, the doctor wouldn't prescribe without seeing me. I begged, but--no--he had to see me. I walked in his office and he said, "Wow, something really got you." I said, "you made me drive all the way down here to tell me that?" The third time I called him, he sounded really annoyed. "I can't keep prescribing cortizone for this," he said. "You can't keep taking it in such a short time period. This is the last time. You can't take it again for 6 months." So I hoarded the dose and only took half of it. I know you're not supposed to do that. I am bad. Well, Tuesday marked the beginning of my sting cycle and now I am swollen up like a balloon. I took the leftover pills I had and they don't seem to be having any effect. Of course, that's because I am taking the dose all wrong. It's his fault. I am going to have to get a beekeeper's hat. Maybe I will feel like Katherine Hepburn. Or maybe not.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Yikes! That's terrible! I'd be hoarding the cortisone, too. What does the doctor expect you to do? Geez.

Amy said...

Mother, for God's sake, get the bee keepers hat. It's awful, you might need a new or additional doctor to get your meds.